This peeing is really getting out of hand.
I woke up at 4:30am, when he was about to pee on the bed. I grabbed the commode bucket and caught all the pee. OK!
I woke at 6:30, only this time he was already peeing on the bed :-/ Luckily only the quilt was wet so I tossed it in the washer. When I came back he obviously had more pee and peed on the sheets through to the mattress pad. So all those have to be washed. I put one of those across-the-bed waterproof things lengthwise on his side to protect the mattress. It did.
Well, no biggie, youâre thinking? Think again!
I normally wash our bedding every other Mon/Tueâwhichever day Rhonda comes. Because of my rotator cuff/deltoid injuries, which have healed only partially, itâs not only painful for me to get the fitted mattress pad and fitted sheet on at the head end of the bed (because of the furniture next to the bed on both sides causes a pessimal reach), I canât do a good job of it. Injuries from hefting my motherâs and brotherâs wheelchairs into & out of my car when they were in assisted living and preferred me to take them on errands and appointments. In retrospect, I should have refused from the get-go. I eventually did. Although it hurt to do it, it didnât occur to me I could injure myself doing thatâno pain, no gain?!? A better aphorism is Too soon old, too late smart :-/
On top of that, I canât find the hubsterâs glasses. We have annual eye appts on May 26, but his frames were new last yearâpresumably the last ones heâd ever need. His eyes also donât change for several years at a time, and Iâm literally certain he doesnât need a new prescription as he got a new one last year. Presumably theyâre in the house somewhere, but I already looked hard.
Last night was odd. He fell asleep in his recliner in the den after dinner (~5:30 or so), as he usually does, but I was unable to rouse him to come to bed until around 8:30. And then he pulled away from me and lay down on the floor less than halfway to the bedroom. Iâm not willing or able to pull him up off the floor against dead weight, so I left him there and came back every few minutes to try again. He never went back to sleep. The last time he must have opened his Depends to pee because his pj bottoms were wet. I eventually got him seated on his side of the bed and pulled the wet pjâs off. His Depends were somewhat wet too, so I tore them off. It took me awhile to get fresh Depends on him as he was lying down and not cooperating in my efforts. I got him sitting again, remembered to give him his 2 trazodone (to help him sleep longer), which he repeatedly spat out so I gave up. I finally got his fresh Depends on, and he was asleep by the time I mopped the floor where he had peed.
He slept till 4:30amâand without trazodone! The rest, you know.
Iâm at the point where, if I could afford it, Iâd probably tuck him away in a MC facility. There are 3 within 2 miles of my house, and 2 more within 4 miles, including one in a wing of my motherâs nursing home. Not really because of the pee issue, as annoying as that is(!), but because the hubster seems less and less like my beloved Jerry. He gives smiles and eye contact only rarely, even to me. Heâs notably worse since DD & grandkids visited. Actually notably worse over the winter and early spring. Just the past few days heâs taken to whipping it out and trying to pee when he doesnât need to. That hasnât happened outside the home as I havenât taken him anywhere lately, but it sure wouldnât be good(!). Although without an erection, not that bad either(!). Not taking him on errands or walks, or even watching as I water my outside plants, is another reason keeping him at home seems less necessary. But $100/day for 4 hours of aide time is a heckuva lot less than âMemory Care,â making a light hit on savings rather than a heavy hit. Iâm cutting back other expensesâŚno more cable (except for internet), no more organic food unles the price is very close to conventional. Not sure what else I can give upâŚI already cut my own hair.do my own nails, and since heâs uncooperative at the barber, back to cutting his hair as well. I only buy us clothing/shoes when something becomes unusable or need a different size. Alas, I finally ordered a new stove (Iâve had no oven for over a year), and a new dishwasher (mineâs been dead for monthsâI donât mind hand-washing except when I have houseguests). My landscapers charge a lot but donât do a lot, so Iâm thinking about that, too.
Meanwhile, my randomly Mon or Tues aide (depending on which day my brother doesnât have PT) means I canât have another permanent Mon or Tue person. But Krystal, my W/F aide, is her daughter, and when sheâs able will come on Tuesdays when Rhonda canât come (Krystal already has a Sunday/Monday client). They know a fellow trustworthy caregiver whoâs apparently tall and strong and will inquire whether she has Thursday availability. Somewhere I have the name and number of DHâs former occupational therapist who told me she moonlights on Saturdays as a caregiver.
Ah, he finished his breakfast (sort of) and dozed off in his recliner (we eat breakfast in our reclinersâmy preference). He woke up after just a few minutesâ nap. I got him to take his morning pills and pee in the toilet. Yay! After trying to pee again in the den <probably needs to poo but I couldnât get him to go back to the bathroom>, he went back to sleep in his recliner.
Life in the dementia zone! (âYou are about to enter another dimension, a dimension not only of sight and sound but of mind. A journey into a wondrous land of imagination. Next stop, the Twilight Zone!â - Rod Serling)
They were on the floor under his reclinerâalong with an anti-cray-cray pill (olanzapine) =8-0