Caregiving is such a LONELY activity

When I was caring for my father during his final decline, my world became smaller and smaller. I was afraid to make plans with friends or to drive more than an hour from my house, because I knew I might get a phone call that would require me to change my plans and race over to my father’s house. And then Covid further restricted social activities.

I found a lot of consolation here, reading about other people’s experiences. I eventually read all of the posts from the beginning and it gave me comfort. Reading this board was part of my coffee routine and sometimes my “I can’t sleep tonight” routine.

I never felt comfortable posting while I was going through it. I was afraid that I might post something, something might happen to my Dad, and I wouldn’t be able to respond in a timely manner. I didn’t want to be rude. I realize now that the kind people here would have completely understood and would have been supportive.

I would like to encourage anyone who feels this way to know that it’s OK to post here, even if you’re not sure when you might get a chance to post again. This is a loving place and people want to help. People understand.

Writing about experiences and emotions can be very therapeutic. I don’t know if this community will last. I hope it does. If not, I would like to again thank everyone for all of the help and support I received, just by being here.




Thank you for coming to the board to let us know that you were helped. It does mean a lot when it can be very hard to know where to turn. I was given a lot of help when I was caring for my husband (he died of Cancer) at the same time I was caring for my dad. He lasted nearly 5 years longer than my husband and his Dementia journey took enough from him that he was basically a toddler by the time he died. Being a caregiver for a parent or spouse is a lonely journey that most people have no real understanding of the loss of autonomy and time for oneself.

I am glad you found so much to give you strength and encouragement and support. Your dad was very blessed to have you by his side and doing what you could for him. You were a very good daughter.



Writing is therapeutic and I would recommend it to anyone going through hard times. Generally speaking, I mean, even if a person doesn’t share it with anyone, it helps a lot. I am a new member here, and I am really glad to hear that the community I’ve just joined is a supportive one. Thank you for sharing this.


I hadn’t discovered this new thread till just now. (I’ll never become facile with this barrier-laden, nonlogical software.)

It’s extremely gratifying to learn that you’ve found meaningful support from this group. Becoming a caretaker for a loved one with a serious, progressive illness is very isolating. I first discovered that when my dad was diagnosed with Alzheimers years ago. I found the Alzheimer’s Association and my local chapter, and they were a life-saver. I found information, guidance, support—all so incredibly essential to helping my dad, dealing with my incredibly unhelpful mother, and trying to take care of myself. This board came to life through several of us who were discussing serious family health problems—providing advice and support—on the old Health and Nutrition board. It’s means so much, knowing that what the amazing group of people here have shared over the years has provided what we had hoped.



If Taking Care of Parents is someplace you want particularly to visit, adding the link below to your browser as a bookmark might be worth it.