The 4 Phases of Retirement

The 4 phases of retirement | Dr. Riley Moynes | TEDxSurrey
https://youtu.be/DMHMOQ_054U

  1. Vacation. Just what it sounds like - hedon. Lasts about 1 year.

  2. Sense of loss. Includes fear, anxiety, depression.
    Don’t want to get up in the morning.

  3. Time of trial and error and floundering on the path to how to have a meaningful life.

  4. The (new) Meaningful Life of “Service to Others”.

The orator says you’ll recognize the phase you are in.

:alien:
ralph has been in hedon for 5 years. I guess I’m immature for my age.

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Hedon

5 Likes

"The 4 phases of retirement | Dr. Riley Moynes | TEDxSurrey
https://youtu.be/DMHMOQ_054U

  1. Vacation. Just what it sounds like - hedon. Lasts about 1 year.

  2. Sense of loss. Includes fear, anxiety, depression.
    Don’t want to get up in the morning.

  3. Time of trial and error and floundering on the path to how to have a meaningful life.

  4. The (new) Meaningful Life of “Service to Others”.

The orator says you’ll recognize the phase you are in.

:alien:
ralph has been in hedon for 5 years. I guess I’m immature for my age.

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Hedon"


Dr. Riley Moynes appears to need his head examined.
Seems embedded in an orifice not designed to contain said head.

Howie52
Folks who claim everyone experiences life in the same ways is not quite as
clever as they see themselves.

10 Likes

I’ve been retired 11 years and I’m still pretty much on stage 1. Before COVID, I volunteered for a few teachers at my old school, 2-3 hours, 2 times a week. It was a lot of fun because the teachers let me do pretty much whatever I wanted. They have asked me to come back this year. It will depend on the local pandemic numbers after we get back from a trip we have planned in September.

1 Like

“1. Vacation. Just what it sounds like - hedon. Lasts about 1 year.”

Wow…I must be the exception - my first phase lasted 20 years.

First five years traveled 1/3rd the time. Went to AK for a month. to HI for a month. Overseas to Germany and Austria and Italy on a Eurail Pass. 3-4 weeks.

Went to Thailand twice. Finished up going to all the counties in the USA with the ham radio equipped car.

Ten years later I went back to HI and AK again for a couple weeks each.

went on trips to Newfoundland, England (Britrail Pass), Cocos Island off Costa Rica and a big ham radio expedition for 10 days, etc. Went to Vietnam, Guadalupe, Costa Rica to visit ham radio operators there and operate their stations.

IN 2016, there was a big radio program for a year - National Parks on the Air. Drove to over 40 states putting out parks, monuments, historic sites on the radio - from Big Bend, TX to many in AZ, UT, CA, UT, CO, WY, OR, PA, MD, VA, FL, etc. Put 50,000 miles on car that year

After 20 years I began to slow down a bit but traveled only 30,000 miles a year by car. Haven’t been on plane in five years and no interest in plane travel any time soon. Seen enough overseas.

Then COVID hit and most of my ‘activities’ around the country canceled so less reason to travel. Past two years have been a slow down but still get around. Activities starting up again. Just put 2300 miles on car to Dayton OH and back (to TX).

Still having the ‘vacation’ moment but now I’m home 80% of the time, gone maybe 20%.

Of course, I retired early at age 52.5. Just bailed out suddenly from dying industry at the right time. Thought about some consulting but too much hassle for too few bucks and that cratered a year later, too.

Well, maybe if you retire at 65 or 68 or 70, you only get the ‘vacation feel’ for a year or two.

After 20 years, now in mid 70s so I guess a lot of folks start slowing down a bit at some point. I’m a bit ‘traveled out’ and other than some conventions here and there, haven’t found too many reasons for long trips. (even though I can afford the gas - now $4.89/gal in TX and seemingly going up 20c a week, week after week)…was $3.99 a month ago.

t.

3 Likes

True enough.

Most retirees have a list of things they always want to have time to do. That can include things like putting together a will or estate plan. Organizing your collection of photos, recipes, stamps, coins, etc. Fishing. Hunting. Model railroading. Family tree research. etc etc. And that bucket list of trips or hikes or adventures you always wanted to explore. Time with family. Grandkids. Gardening. Church.

In phase three many decide which of those is satisfying and worth continuing.

Volunteering is a great way to overcome that sense of loss. I do Kiwanis. But there are plenty of others out there. It gets you out of the house and involved with people. And thinking about how you can contribute. I think keeping active is the key.

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I must have skipped steps 2 (sense of loss) and 3 (trial and error).

I spent 2 weeks in 1 (vacation) and then started doing 4 (service to others).

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I do Kiwanis. But there are plenty of others out there. It gets you out of the house and involved with people. And thinking about how you can contribute. I think keeping active is the key.

At the local community college during in-service one year they had a session where they had a bunch of retired employees come back and share a bit about their retirement experience and things to do to prepare.

The take-aways were:

  1. Retirement is hard on those who have no interests unrelated to work. Those are the people who tend to spend time at home doing nothing other than driving their spouse crazy (if the spouse is also retired or not working).

  2. Retirement often doesn’t have to be nothing to suddenly all; some people get part-time jobs or step down to a part-time position to transition into retirement.

  3. Developing hobbies or interests not tied directly to work helps. Especially develop some interest that gets you out of the house on occasion for social contact.

For the first few years of my retirement I was active in my church, in its VBS in the summer as well as filling the seat pockets (contact cards, offering envelopes, etc.), serving coffee at one of the rest areas on I-5, and volunteer at a couple of food banks. Covid had put a crimp on my activities for a while, and now my wife and I volunteer at another food bank three days a week and most recently we have planted a small vegetable garden in our back yard, so that will also keep us busy.

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Retirement does mean a change of lifestyle. Loss of some social contacts as with co-worker.

Its an adjustment. Some do the transition better than others. It is something to plan for.

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I have never paid much attention to so-called experts who claim to know everything about everyone and how they should live. I’ve always done what worked for me – not what some “expert” said I should do.

I’ve been retired for over 20 years. So has my wife. Our retirement was caused by some of life’s unexpected events, but we’ve done fine, anyway. We still love where we live and we still love each other. In other words, we’re still basically happy.

Does life stay all peachy and wonderful all the time in retirement? No – of course not. But you learn to cope and deal and do what you can, just as you did before you retired.

Create your own “phases”. Skip the experts.

Vermonter

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Vermonter ~

I couldn’t agree more with what you said.

Some days I stay really busy and volunteer.
Some days I just stay home and loll around.
Some days I work in the community garden for hours.
Some days I wake up really early and other days I don’t.
Some days I dehydrate or can food and some days I make bread.
Some days I declutter to donate so that my mind and living space is more clear.

The great thing is that most days I don’t have an appointment
or need an alarm clock and that is real freedom. I love where
I live and am so glad I downsized. A positive thing about the
“shutdown” is that I learned to can, dehydrate, start a garden
and make bread. I may not have done that had things remained normal.
I am looking to make a silver lining out of a sow’s ear.

Robyn

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I don’t think I’ve been in any of those stages. I “sort of retired” 20 years ago when I was laid off and found a part time job I liked. Then worked a part time seasonal job for several years until Covid when I decided I didn’t want to work from home either. Spent about 15 years doing marathons and half marathons. Spent the last 7ish years of widowhood on deferred maintenance of the house. Still some to go on that, but mostly working on the landscaping this year. No more lawn, converting to native plants to support native pollinators. Volunteer at the local library a couple of hours a week. Have a pretty solid group of friends that I spend time with. Have enough income to do what I want and enough retirement savings that my money guy says I won’t run out of money in my lifetime. Life is good and I’m probably as happy as I’ve ever been.

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rosewine ~

Your life sounds fantastic. So happy you won’t run out of money.
Changing the landscaping to pollinating plants sounds great.
I have a guy than mows my front and back lawns twice a month but
I like the idea of replanting to get rid of the grass.

Robyn

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Changing the landscaping to pollinating plants sounds great.

This is probably my most important activity right now and a long term project. I converted the parking strip to natives a couple of years ago. Dumped arborist wood chips on the front and back yards last fall to decompose over the winter. Looked for some help with hardscaping in the early spring and ended up doing it myself when the responses seemed to be the “take advantage of the old lady” verity. Put in a walk way along the driveway. Broke up an old concrete walkway on the other side of the yard. Dug out a rain garden and have someone coming Monday to disconnect the downspouts on the front of the house.About half the yard is now planted and I will get a lot more in the ground next week. It still looks messy right now, but should be glorious by next spring.

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Rose: Dug out a rain garden and have someone coming Monday to disconnect the downspouts on the front of the house.

I read this to say you completely removed the rain garden.

May I inquire why?

:sun_with_face::thinking::sun_with_face:
ralph

Sorry. I wasn’t clear. I dug out part of the yard to form a rain garden. So, smallish ditches to direct water from the downspouts and a depression to collect the water where it can soak into the ground rather than going in to the sewer systems. I’ll get a break on the city water/sewage bill for doing so.

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We (DH and I) are the lucky ones, and wish everyone could feel as good about their retirement.

We live in a retirement community (about 40 minutes from grandchildren), with health care attached if and when we need it.
We have a 2.5 bedroom 2 bath apartment with large balcony for plants, plus our own small garden bed.(Full of tomato plants promising a big harvest)
Three restaurants downstairs
Two swimming pools
Bocce, miniature golf, fitness room
Cinema downstairs with daily movies
800 other people on the property for new friends, dinner friends, exercise friends etc etc
I have my:
Chinese class
Water aerobics class
Choir
Chinese choir (when we have it)
Book Club
Readers’ Theater
Sherlock Holmes Club
Volunteer teaching English as second language to employees
Tender Loving Care Coordinator (Helping other residents with mail, shopping etc)
Song writing for any occasion (official or not)
Walkie Talkies ( early morning 1-2 miles with friends)
Time to be with my husband, especially over PBS News, Jeopardy, cosy evenings…

And I can lounge in bed whenever I want…

DH is now Chair of the Resident Council as well as still pro bono for some former clients in the real world so his mind is still very sharp…

I have two friends in my former community and both husbands are scared of retiring and being “bored”…Their wives are sort of dreading the new lifestyle…

I feel very guilty being so lucky at a time when homelessness here, and war in Ukraine, mean others are so unhappy…so I do try to help in small ways. Our community raised $107,000 for children in Ukraine and so far not all the money has been counted…

May others on this board enjoy life as much as we do…

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"We have a 2.5 bedroom 2 bath apartment "


2.5 bedrooms?

2 1/2 baths has a bathroom with a sink & toilet - sometimes a shower rather than a tub.

But what is a half bedroom?

Howie52
Curious world we live in.

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It is a small bedroom, so advertised as a 3-bedroom apartment, but that room didn’t have built in closets when we arrived ( we were first owners) and I believe without closets it is NOT always considered a bedroom…maybe I should have said “den”, not 1/2 bedroom.
We had it made into DH’s office with lots of built-in desk space and many cabinets, file drawers etc, but it can still hold a twin bed for a grandson as well…

Hope that muddled explanation clarifies the arrangement for you, Howie!

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“It is a small bedroom, so advertised as a 3-bedroom apartment, but that room didn’t have built in closets when we arrived ( we were first owners) and I believe without closets it is NOT always considered a bedroom…”

To be a legal ‘bedroom’ it must have an exit other than the entry into the room - such as a window at least 2x2 feet (Or your local code).

t.

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It has a nice window overlooking balcony.